I used to have beautiful, flowing, blonde locks that were “boob length” You know…my hair was long enough to just cover my nips . I kept it that long for a while and always used my boobs as a gauge as to how long my hair was.
“OH, it’s grown past the bottom part of my boob, time for a trim!”
“Awwwww, George! You cut a little too much! I can see my nipples!”
Then I chopped it and whenever I reminisced about my long hair, I would always reference my boobs.
“It used to be this long” (using my hands to show that my hair covered my nips at one point in time. I mourned my long hair for a really long time. I did things to change it up; dyed it red, black, back to blonde, cut it in funky styles. Nothing measured up. I really, seriously missed my long hair.
But now having nipple length hair means something completely different. My hair is growing quite long recently. I have a good 3 inches until I get back to the old “nipple length hair”. But the current “nipple length hair” would require another at least 6″ worth of growth.
That’s freaking scary, folks. I’m going to have hippie-length hair just so that I can pretend I’m the Little Mermaid when I get out of the shower.
Alas, I guess that’s what happens when a few things happen:
1. You gain 80 lbs.
2. Your breasts grow to porn-star proportions while you are breastfeeding
3. You breastfeed 2 kids within 18 months
4. You turn 30 and your collagen begins to decline.
Take your pick. I’d be willing to bet that it’s a nice combo of all 4.
OH the joys.