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Come to Our Nest 
I, as always, applaud your honesty. I practice many of those same “bad” parenting techniques. My favorite “bad” parenting technique is using the “I’m calling Daddy” line when he’s being naughty. Works like a charm … for now! Anyway, your kids are happy, healthy, and full of live and love … you might not be perfect but you’re doin’ something right!
Hockey Wife (@HockeyWife_22) recently posted..Thanks, Tips.
Thanks, Hockey Wife! I used the “I’m Calling Daddy” line on Madilyn today and it seemed to work. It was funny.
You’re obviously doing something right too!
I think that any discipline, within reason, that is done out of love and to teach and never ever done when angry, is probably effective. Each child is different and some respond to a stern voice (me as a kid! A stern voice petrified me!) but others like to see how far they can push it.
Your kids are very loved!
Maria recently posted..Would you?
Yes, Maria exactly my point. If it’s done with the intention of harm and not to guide your child, it’s done with the wrong intention. Grady is currently responding to a stern voice which makes parenting him SO super easy. Stern voices don’t intimidate Ms. Madilyn at ALL. Positive feed back and talking always helped Styles. He was pretty peaceful to raise. But again, each child is different and responds differently to different things. Think I could have said “different” again?
My sister liked to see how far she could push it and then I received the brunt of the discipline. I hope to not do that to my children!
I love you for this post. So often, parents are made to feel like we should feel guilty or ashamed or how we parent our children. But, honestly, every parent can’t possibly raise their children the same. What works for one does not work for all and I’m tired of being made to feel like less of a parent for the choices that work for MY family.
Lindsay recently posted..Mamavation Monday: Losing Inches
Thanks, Lindsay! I had to say it because so many parents are shamed into lying about the things that they do to parent. Beating is bad. Spanking is not. Keep doing what you’re doing if it’s working for you and your family!
Summer recently posted..“Bad Parenting” Techniques That I Practice Daily: Part 2
What a wonderful blog I’m always so proud of you. You are a wonderful mom and my grandchildren are loved and lucky to have u for their mommy. You are remarkable my wonderful daughter I’m so Blessed for our relationship
Thanks, mama! I’m blessed for our relationship too.
Warning: long comment!
I practice 6, 7, 8, 9 and 10 (from time to time).
#6 (doctors), We use a combination of medical doctors, naturopathic doctors and home remedies…this wisdom has come with time, and experience.
#7 (milk)my three girls were exclusively breastfed (firstborn, 26 months, second, 19 months, third, 18 months). My oldest daughter has a dairy sensitivity (it gives her stomach cramps) we have all kinds of “milk” for her and alternate between soy, almond, rice, coconut and hemp. We do have SOME cows milk and cheese (my oldest daughter being the exception).
#8 (tv) I considered it a badge of parenting honor that my oldest child didn’t watch tv until she was three, but I feel like the tv has been on ever since my second child was born (firstborn was 3.5 at the time)…do I feel guilty- yes…Are there some people that I would NEVER tell? yes.
#9 (tattoos) We love tattoos at our house!
#10- I have swatted a child from time to time- something I NEVER thought I would do.It is not routine, and NOT my first choice for a consequence…
I LOVED your long comment. I actually thought of you while I was writing this post. We have super similar parenting styles (I think) and I was worried that I would upset you with #10. It makes me SO, SO happy to know that I’m not the only one like “us” who swats from time to time. It’s not my #1 either but it is really the only effective thing with Madilyn. #8: Styles watched lots and lots of TV until he was 2 and then he didn’t watch it again until he was 5. Those 3 years were wonderful. If I was a single mom again, I would not have cable. Kyle and I tried to not have it and he nearly broke my neck and buried me in the back yard so I begged him to turn it back on. The man just CAN’T go without TV. Sad. #9: US TOO! I’m getting #5 (really #6 but the “real” #5 was a cover-up) soon. A 1/4 sleeve of flowers from every state I’ve lived in. I can’t WAIT! #6: I started using homeopathy and naturopathy when Styles was 2. I swear by elberberry and saline.
Summer recently posted..“Bad Parenting” Techniques That I Practice Daily: Part 2
Very brave. I don’t know that I agree with everything but seeing as how I don’t have kids, who knows what I will do when the time comes! I respect that you will be honest about what you do as a parent. [Having read the part I] I agree there are lots of things “good” parents do that would make others think of them as “bad” parents. So long as you aren’t breaking the law or putting your child’s life/health/safety at risk … your choice!
Sara recently posted..Remembering an Amazing Man
Hi Summer.. Actually I have learned a lot of information about parenting here… Thanks for the inspiration you have provided through your post…
Mhikkai recently posted..Jay Robb Whey Protein
You guys are cute!
I’m a mix between a helicopter parent and a free range parent (weird, I know), so I can’t wait to write my post.
Sadie recently posted..Africa’s Birthday Giveaway Ends 4/24
Thanks, Sadie! I TOTALLY get the helicopter parent/ Free range parent mix. I’m a TOTAL helicopter parent at the beach.
I can’t wait to READ your post!
As I said before I am a bad parent too then! I had to give up breast feeding though because of my anemia
. My parents did the same punishments to me and we are close so me carrying this over to my son made sense in many ways. He hates me so much that when he gets home from school he wants cuddle time! Keep it up!
Heather Bryant recently posted..Coffee and Chocolate… A Review and Giveaway!
It sounds like your child isn’t at all well-rounded!
I practice most of these too…The one that I think gets people fired up most is the “swatting” issue. I was spanked a few times when i was much younger and after a few good spankings I knew beforehand what my consequences were if I messed up. Therefore I didn’t mess up often and was a good child. I am a perfectly normal, productive, sane adult who doesn’t fear, resent or have issues with my parents. I always knew that spanking would be a tactic i would probably use on my own children since it worked on me. I do smack Carson on the hand or something if he throws his food on the floor, throws a toy,etc. My favorite is when it happens in a restaurant and the people next to us look at me like i’m crazy….I think to myself, “I triple dog dare you to say something to me about the way I chose to discipline my own child”. So far no one has, bummer cuz i’d love to go ape on a stranger in a restaurant, lol! My point is you’re right, everyone has their own tactics that work for each individual child and family. I don’t understand why as parents we feel the need to compete for the best child/parent award and/or belittle others for the way they chose to parent their children. I say as long as your children are happy, healthy and responding positively to whatever method you so chose then keep up the good work. Now if you’re child is still crazy after you do said chosen method then you probably should try a different tactic, lol.
Thanks, Chelsea! The “Swatting” issue definitely gets people fired up. I never had to use it with Styles because he responded to verbal cues. Madilyn? Requires it. There is a difference between beating and swatting. Thanks for having the courage to comment that you do the same thing. The REALLY unfortunate thing is that there is a class of parent who are SO stuck on the way that they think their children should be raised that they aren’t cluing in to their child’s individual needs.
This was refreshing! Our parenting styles sound a lot alike. Good to know I’m not alone!
Kadie recently posted..Who’s To Say
Thanks for this. We spank in our house and I really dislike that we live in a time where I seriously have to consider who I tell that too or refrain from doing that in public. I didn’t go into parenting knowing I’d do it, but time out was a joke to my child and spanking works. Same here that it’s always followed up with conversation and lots of love. I posted on a Mommy blog once to a Mom that was having trouble and said here is what we are doing and this is what works for my family and had another Mother comment about how awful of a parent I was for beating my child. People are mean. I read a book called Dare To Discipline – great read!!!
We also do very little dairy and have had the same type of comments. I’ve found some local whole milk that I feel a little better about but we do a lot more almond milk than anything.
Well sometimes you just need the TV to keep your sanity!!!
Thanks for sharing!
I am a new follower! I am so happy to have found your blog through a “A Dulce Vida”. I am a believer in “what works for you parenting ” and instincts. I too have breastfed children and treat their illnesses naturally. Like you I too let me kids enjoy their favorite time of shows/ movies so I can get some work done. Truth be told I have too felt guilty when I was a new mom. Love your honesty and sense of humor! Many good wishes to you and your family
Alma recently posted..Princess days
Thanks for joining us in this conversation! It’s fantastic to hear that I’m not the only “Bad Parent” out there.
Growing up, spanking was always saved for when we REALLY screwed up. I know I’ll most likely be a “swatter” parent too
Discipline is such a touchy subject nowadays… I applaud your honesty, and high-five from a fellow “swatter.”
I don’t spank or swat often (it is not my preferred method of discipline), but there are times when I think a swat and a very firm “NO” is absolutely the right way to go — such as the time Bug learned how to pull the protective covers out of the electrical outlets, or the time he tried to reach onto the stove while I was cooking, etc. If it has to do with safety, you can bet I’m going to swat him on the butt. It gets his attention, and since I don’t do it very often it makes a big impression on him.
That said, I’m a big fan of time-outs. We have a designated spot in our house for Time Out, and Bug learned really quick that when I say “time out,” I mean it. Even when we’re out of the house, I don’t mind stopping in the middle of the store and parking his butt on the sidelines for three minutes. Now, all I have to do is ask “Do you need a time out?” and he will usually redirect his behavior. (And a few times he’s actually put HIMSELF in time out when I’ve had to use my stern voice with him over something. Bless his goofy little heart.)
Actually, time out became a bit of a discipline godsend for me recently. But got sick in August — very, very sick. We spent the better part of seven months in the hospital for treatments, and boy was he cranky! It was hard to keep up with discipline then, but I knew that he would walk all over me when he got better if I didn’t do *something* — so we had time-outs even when he was in the hospital, hooked up to an IV pole, with a line coming out of his chest. Oooh, I got SUCH dirty looks from people when we would go out for a walk and I’d have to park him on a bench for a time out! But there were times when he’d try to twist away from me, and he’d nearly pull his line, or he’d yell at me… so I got really good at my “mind your own business” expressions.
And now that Bug is healthy again (remission as of March 15th), I’m so glad that I didn’t slack off on the discipline. He still knows to mind his manners and to pick up his toys, or he will have to go to time out — and if he needs a swat, I can do that again, too! I just wish that other parents would do the same, because we still go in for clinic visits once a month, and there are so many sick and recovering kids there that act like horrible little brats… and their parents won’t redirect them or discipline them because they feel sorry for them. (I can’t tell you how many times other parents have asked me questions like, “How do you get him to put the toys back before he goes to see the doctor?” or “How do you get him to take his medicine without a huge fight?” and all I can say is that I expect him to mind me, and if he kicks up a fuss he gets to take a time out — and then he still has to do whatever it was that he was fussing over, anyway.)
…sorry, I seem to have gone off on a tangent there. tl;dr = Discipline is good. Consequences are good.
Thank you SO much for the awesome comment. I love that you do time out in public. It’s so important to remind our kids that we’re still their parents, even when we’re out and about. Congratulations on remission!!!!! And KUDOS to you for maintaining your discipline. I never understood why my mom said that she disciplined me because she loved me but I GET it now. Discipline is one of the most difficult forms of love but it’s true; we discipline our children because we LOVE them and we know what they are capable of.