A Typical Day in the Life: How we Deal

I don’t know about yours, but my life is insane.  It starts early and ends late, and there is rarely any time to breathe.  Want to see what I mean?

6:30am:  Alarm goes off.  I groan, roll out of bed, sometimes directly onto my face, then slither to the bathroom to put a bra and some pants on.  Sometimes I remember deodorant, others I just plain forget.  Sorry.

It’s true. I’m way funnier after breakfast. Look out, lunch!

6:45am:  I go downstairs to make Styles breakfast.  Waffle, Breakfast Hot Pocket, omelet, cereal, bacon; it varies with the wind.  The kid never wants the same thing so every day is a surprise.  I don’t do any of that without first boiling some hot water for the coffee press, though.  I can’t even tell you my first name without coffee coursing through my veins.

Sometime between 6:30am and 7am, Grady wakes up and wants to be nursed.  He can’t start a day without “his milk”, sort of like I can’t start a day without coffee.

 7:00am:  I’m slugging hot coffee, nursing Grady, and feeding myself some bacon & eggs.

7:15am:  I change Grady’s diaper, generally after he has left me a nice present.  I despise changing his diaper then having a fresh gift a few minutes later so I just wait until he’s made the deposit to change him.  It’s that breastmilk.  It really gets things moving.

7:30am:  I’m gently (yeah right) coaxing Styles to brush his teeth, fix his hair, and for goodness sake, to STOP TALKING!

Even the camera is tired this early in the morning!

7:45am:  I’m buckling Grady into the car seat, urging Styles to please tie his shoes quicker, and gulping down the ice cold slurp of coffee grains left in my mug.

8:00am:  I’m dropping Styles off at the bus loop, mentally ticking things off in my head that I have to do for the day, and praying that I don’t get pulled over because I haven’t brushed my teeth yet.

8:15am:  I’m back home just in time for Madilyn to wake up.  The queen demands breakfast immediately upon rising from her palatial bed so I chop fruit for both babies, pour a bowl of cereal to keep her mouth busy, and scramble an egg with ham for her to eat.  Unless all she wants is a peanut butter lollipop, then I grab a jar of peanut butter and a spoon, scoop some out, and hand it to her on my way to the bathroom.

8:45am:  I sit down to check my email and catch up on the blogs that I follow while the babies watch Yo Gabba Gabba or Backyardigans on Netflix.

9:00am:  The babies are screaming at one another so I decide it’s time to go get dressed and break things up a little bit.

9:15am:  Babies are finally dressed and we head back downstairs where I am met with the mess from hell.  Who came to visit while we were upstairs?  The Birthday Monsters?  Good lord!

9:30am:  I pour myself another cup of coffee, throw it in the microwave for a minute, and start sweeping the floor.

9:10am:  I finally go get the cup of coffee out of the microwave once I just can’t stand to hear the microwave beep one more time.  Darnit!  It’s warm already.  I set it in for another 45 seconds and start doing the breakfast dishes.

9:20am:  I get the coffee out of the microwave and try to drink it again.  CRAP!  It’s too cool again.  OH well, I’m going to drink it anyways.

9:25am:  I sit back down at the computer and attempt to pound out a blog post.  Oh wait, what’s that?  Something pretty on someone else’s blog.  I start reading and commenting, and pinning, and sharing, and… “Grady STOP CRYING!”

10:15am:  OH YEAH!  It’s your nap time.  We go upstairs and I nurse him to sleep, sing “twinkle, twinkle little star”, lay him down with his monster and my old blankie, then creep out.

10:45am:  I sit down with Madilyn and we color or do puzzles or play games.  I am grateful that the Pteradactyl (AKA Grady) is asleep so I can try to enjoy Madilyn for a bit.

11:00am:  The Workaholic climbs out of bed, scratches his butt, yawns morning breath into the air, fluffs his hair, and climbs into the shower.  The sound of the water running causes Madilyn to go into a tizzy and she races upstairs screaming, “DADDY IS ‘WAKE!!!!!!!!!”

11:01am:  I am running up the stairs after her whisper-shouting “MADILYN, IF YOU WAKE GRADY UP YOU WILL BE IN TIME OUT FOR THE REST OF THE DAY!”

11:05am:  I FINALLY get to brush my teeth, wash my face, put a real shirt on, and do something with my mop of hair.  I sometimes even jump in the shower.  Not usually, though.

11:30am:  Madilyn wants a snack, The Workaholic wants coffee and breakfast.  I head back downstairs to make breakfast for the increasingly difficult to please with eggs husband and boil more water for another coffee press.  I may or may not tell The Workaholic that I’ve already had two huge cups of coffee.

NOON:  Holy God in Heaven, how is it that I’ve already been awake for 5.5 hours?  I haven’t accomplished a single thing!

12:30pm:  Madilyn wants lunch.  I boil some water for G-free mac & cheese, cook her a Hot Pocket, or a hot dog and some broccoli.

1:00pm:  Madilyn is eating lunch, I’m contemplating a salad or last night’s leftovers.  Grady screams from upstairs.

1:15pm:  Grady is eating lunch, I’m cleaning Madilyn up, dressing her for the 2nd time that day because if a single, microscopic crumb falls on her shirt it is dirty and shall be washed.

1:25pm:  Grady has smeared peaches all into his hair and thrown the remainder of his lunch on the floor.  I dunk him in the sink and pull the broom out of the closet for the second time.  The Workaholic walks by, winks and walks upstairs.

1:26pm:  I roll my eyes, sweep up the mess and give the kids some crayons and a coloring book.

2:00pm:  I’m scrubbing Crayola crayons off of the walls and floor while the children are climbing all over my back, shrieking at the top of their lungs.  The Workaholic rushes out the door, refreshed and revived while I remove a foot from my eye socket.

2:15pm:  Lord, help me.  I still haven’t made it to the grocery store, I have to pick Styles up in 45 minutes, Madilyn’s hair needs to be brushed, I have to take her to dance, take Styles to cross country, and get myself to the gym.  All before 6pm when Grady melts down and requires dinner.  Dinner.  Wait.  I never ate lunch.

2:30pm:  I’m filling sippy cups and water bottles, warming up a Hot Pocket and loading the kids in the car.

2:35pm:  I left the Hot Pocket in the microwave.  I go back inside to get it, run back out to the car.

2:37pm:  Where are my sunglasses?  I Can’t drive without them, they are prescription and it clearly states on my drivers license, “Must Wear Corrective Lenses”.

2:39pm:  After my second trip in to find my sunglasses shoved into the bottom of Madilyn’s purse with sticky fingerprints all over the lenses, I lick them, wipe them off with my shirt, stick them on my face, and fire up the engine.

3:05pm:  Madilyn is asleep, Grady is talking about bubba and balls, I’m playing Little Village on my iPhone and the carpool line starts to move.  Crap, y’all!  I just started feeding my dinosaurs!

3:15pm:  I’ve managed to play 3 rounds of Matching with Friends without rear-ending someone and Styles climbs into the car smelling like a sweaty boy, instead of the amazing smelling young man that I dropped off at school earlier the same day. I shove the Hot Pocket into his hands (it has FINALLY cooled off enough to be eaten) and he gobbles it down.

3:30pm:  We get home, I tell Styles to go do his homework and change into his workout clothes.

Running to Cross Country (that’s a real knee-slapper, y’all!)

4:15pm:  I’m yelling up the stairs, “TIME TO GO TO THE GYM!”  Or “PRACTICE!”  Or “DAAAAANNNNCEEE TIME, MADILYN!”  And sometimes all three.

4:17pm:  Buckling the babies into the car, urging Styles to tie his shoes and remind him that he needs a water bottle.

4:20pm:  On our way to Cross Country, Dance Class (on Thursdays), and the YMCA all at the same time.

4:30pm:  I hop on an elliptical and start running as fast as I can.  I don’t know where I’m going but I hope to get there soon.

5:15pm:  Pick a screaming Grady up from the Kid’s Zone at the Y, a happy Madilyn, and then a sweaty and famished Styles.

5:45pm:  Start on dinner, but not before popping some Hot Pockets Snackers into the microwave for 60 seconds so that Styles will stop complaining about how fracking hungry he is.

6:45pm:  Dinner is served.

6:55pm:  I’m yelling at Grady to stop throwing food on the floor, Madilyn to sit her naked butt down in her seat and EAT, and Styles to STOP talking because we’ve been eating for ten minutes and he has yet to take a bite of food.

7:15pm:  I call a truce, remove all children from the table, throw the babies into the bathtub, and Styles in the shower.

7:45pm:  I’m nursing Grady for bed, Madilyn & Styles are watching Sprout on the TV on the 3rd floor.

8:00pm:  Grady is asleep and I sneak out quietly with my iPhone, go lie on my bed and visit my games to see how many Matching with Friends & Words with Friends games I have to catch up on.

8:01pm:  I breathe for the first time all day.

8:15pm:  Madilyn comes to the second floor wondering where I am.  I instruct Styles to go read while I read to Madilyn.

8:45pm:  Lights out.  OH wait, Madilyn needs water?  AND has to pee?  Same for Styles.  OH Styles forgot to buy clarinet reeds.  Perfect.  Day 3 without reeds tomorrow.

9:00pm:  Lights out for real.  Madilyn is terrified of the “scary monster” under the nightstand.  Styles can’t sleep because he is worrying about clarinet reeds and what people will think of him if he has to ask his teacher for help opening his locker.

9:30pm:  Madilyn is kicking me in the ribs, punching me in the nose, and making a rat’s nest out of her hair fighting the sleep that so desperately wants to envelop her.

10:15pm:  I wake from a light sleep, smack my lips, rub my eyes and face the reality that I still have a dirty floor to sweep for the 3rd time of the day, mop for the first time of the day, and dinner dishes to clean.

11:45pm:  I can finally go to bed.  I start climbing the stairs and remember that I haven’t yet made Styles’ lunch.

12:03am:  Put Styles’ lunch bag into the refrigerator and make my way upstairs to wash my face & brush my teeth.  Sometimes I take a shower, but not always.

2:15am:  The Workaholic calls to tell me he is on his way home then proceeds to tell me about his night.  I never remember a thing from this call.

3:00am:  The Workaholic comes up the stairs rattling his keys and scares all bodily fluids out of me.

6:30am:  Start all over again.

That is no joke, people.  Every.  Single.  Day.  That’s just a “normal” day.  That list doesn’t include the days Grady has a tub turd or Madilyn pees all over the floor because she has decided that playing with baby dolls is way more important than using the restroom.

If it weren’t for easy snacks like #HotPocketsSnacks, I may not survive at all.  I’d be feeding my children dandelions from the side of the road with a ditch water chaser.

Luckily, I can take 60-120 seconds from my day to pop these in the microwave and give them to the kids while we’re in the car on the way to our sports activities.  I love that they stay hot for so long but I wish they made a gluten-free version for my poor gluten intolerant baby cakes.  OH and a bonus?  They have such a wide variety of products now that Styles never gets tired of any one thing.  That seriously rocks.

What do you do to make your life easier on a busy day?

Disclosure:  I am a member of the Collective Bias™ Social Fabric® Community.  This shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper insights study for Collective Bias™ and Nestle #CBias #SocialFabric

0saves

Save

Buffer

If you enjoyed this post, please consider leaving a comment or subscribing to the RSS feed to have future articles delivered to your feed reader.